The Chicken Army and the Barnacle Wars

Banty Hen Bandied About

Some things about LM will always remain a mystery. Gaps about his first six years can never be filled in, such as The Chicken Army, a concept that LM was fanatical about from day one as our son. Nobody could explain it, and the only connection we could figure was his yellow bicycle helmet, which looked like an egg yolk. This fixation expanded to include Barnacles. Everything was about the Chicken Army or Barnacles, so MIM and I, in the interest of a balanced mythology, began referring to the Barnacle Wars every time the Chicken Army was bandied about. This caused LM to drop the obsession entirely. Nothing like the damper of having your parents take up your fascination.

A Henbrained Idea

Although the Barnacles have fled our coop, the Chicken Army has taken up permanent roost in our home. This year we put on our Second Annual Burning Chicken Festival (, and, once again, our Christmas tree is topped by a homemade chicken ornament–the Beak of Bethlehem.

Who needs J.R. R. Tolkien when we’ve got the Chicken Army and the Barnacle Wars running afoul on our own front stoop?

[Credits: Hens drawn by MIM, hand-colored by LM. Get your orders in early for nest* year.]

*Not a typo, though perhaps that would be more forgivable than another pun.

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